Wednesday, July 22, 2009

naming names

I`ve been in Japan for two months now and i`ll only be here for a few more days but while i`ve been here i`ve noticed some interesting names. Not people, they have normal names like Nakamura or Muto or Jimmy. No, the strange names i am referring to come from slightly less obvious places and all of them are in English.

Cigarettes I don`t even smoke but these are some genuine cig names.
Golden Bat (that`s my favourite)
Alaska Menthol (??)
Philip Morris

Coffee I utterly hate coffee but you can buy any of these in vending machines in Japan.
Roots Magic Wave
Boss Coffee Rainbow
Black Boss
Jet Cafe

Cars I don`t drive but some of the names are unavoidable.
Honda Life
Honda That`s
Suzuki Every (Everyday? Everybody? Every now and then?)
Toyota Noah (which, although a large vehicle, did not seem fully equipped to withstand a flood of biblical proportions)
Nissan Vanette (it was a small van actually)
Honda Zest (hmm, lemony)
Suzuki Carry (which it can)
Daihatsu Naked (which it is)
Suzuki We`ve (We`ve what? Got a stupid name for a car?)

Music These are actual factual Japanese bands and some of the names of the records they have made.
10 Feet Super Stomper
Veni Vidi Vicious have and album called I Like Beethoven. Especially His Lyrics.
Mongol 800.
Egg Brain have a second album called So Far, So Good.
Baseball Bear released Breeeeze Girl.
Da Pump. Yes, Da Pump. And they have an album called Summer Rider.
Doping Panda. I would pay good money to see a band called Doping Panda. Is is part of there set? Who knows? All i know is they have an album called Decadence and it`s not all that bad.
There`s a band called Best Newcomer of the Year and for all i know they might be. They do have an album called Pizza of Death Records. Yes. Yes they do.
Chaos In Apple. Genius.
There`s somebody called Rudebwoy Face who has an album simply called Bob.

I secretly love this country. And before you get any ideas please note that drugs and psychotropic substances are highly illegal in Japan so either there`s something in sushi that the rest of the world is overlooking or this country really is as happily crazy i think it might be.

No comments:

Post a Comment